Humans have been making New Year’s Resolutions for over 4000 years (though I’m sure the Ancient Babylonians weren’t making goals as unrealistic as ours). It’s human nature to set goals at the start of something new, and after the hellscape year we’ve all endured, it’s only natural to start looking ahead.
But it’s important we remember that goals don’t always come to fruition. In fact, 80% of resolutions fail before the year’s out, and 20% fail in the first week alone.
If you want to be kinder to yourself in 2021, stop making these five New Year’s Resolutions.
To Lose X Amount Of Weight In Three Months
Just under 50% of the people who made New Year’s resolutions in 2019 wanted to lose weight, according to YouGov. This in itself isn’t harmful. What does make it harmful, though, is the inclination to fixate on a certain number and, even worse, when you compound this with a specific date or time frame.
We must stop putting so much pressure on an arbitrary number on the scale, especially when many people feel no different once they reach it. In the grand scheme of things, that number means nothing; it’s how you feel that matters.
Compounding this with an unrealistic time frame is a recipe for either failure or developing unhealthy practices to achieve your goal. Losing a lot of weight in a short amount of time will mean you have to resort to unhealthy eating and exercise habits, which can be damaging in the long run.
This will do nothing but make you feel guilty when you do eat something you deem unacceptable and make you feel exhausted from constant body-shaming. You deserve better than that in 2021.
To Exercise Everyday
Stop telling yourself you’re going to exercise everyday. It’s unrealistic at best and, frankly, it’s pointless. Sorry.
Goals like this – which force you to find time in the day that you just don’t have – are impossible to stick to. Either, you’ll give up early and end up feeling bad about yourself, or you’ll stick to it for a while before suffering severe burnout.
Going from zero to a hundred overnight will do numbers on your cortisol levels, leading to stress (which is definitely counterproductive to the goal of changing your body) and, besides, rest is the most important part of any exercise regime. That’s where the magic happens.
If you want to start exercising in the New Year, slow and steady always wins the race. Take your foot off the gas and ease yourself in. That way, you can be sure to make this a lifestyle change rather than a short term fad.
To Join The Gym (If You Hate The Gym)
Apparently 12% of gym goers sign up in January. Almost half quit after six months.
No particular type of exercise is conducive to the goal of becoming healthy in 2021, and finding what works for you will be the true facilitator. Forcing yourself to do something you hate will only lead to you feeling bad about yourself when you don’t want to. Find something you enjoy doing and can stick to in 2021.
To Find Love
If you spent 2020 cooped up on your own throughout various lockdowns, we don’t blame you for wanting to cure your loneliness in 2021.
But, as I’m sure you’ve heard from every love guru and their mother, love isn’t something you can look for. It’s something you stumble across, often when you least expect it and most likely as soon as you’ve given up trying.
Looking for love puts the pressure on finding your other half; the person who will make you feel whole. Instead of spending your time on countless failed Zoom dates and Tinder matches, you should work on nurturing the love you have for yourself, and the love you’re taking for granted from your family and friends.
To Be Happy
I hate to break it to you, but nothing is certain, especially not happiness, and you really can’t force it.
A more positive outlook will do you some good, but think carefully about where you’re hoping to source this new found happiness from. Is it work? A partner? That holiday you’ve been looking forward to since you first booked it in January 2020, that you finally might get to go on after a number of reschedules?
Take the pressure off yourself to be happy for a whole year and opt instead for a little bit of optimism. Learn to see the silver-lining where you can, which is known to improve relationships, health and – you guessed it – overall happiness.
