Many people need some extra support every now and then. More than a third of adults say that they feel lonely when they’re stressed, yet still find it difficult to share the load. Some people think that they will be burdening their loved ones with their problems, or perhaps they just don’t have anyone they can fully trust with problems so close to their heart. Peer Collective offers what could be an ideal solution to this lack of communication.
After answering just a few straightforward questions about the kind of problems I was facing, what kind of help I was looking for, and what kind of counsellor I was looking for, dozens of names, faces, and bios popped up in front of me, all with available times that very day. Within an hour, I was chatting to Kaila face-to-face (via webcam), laughing as her dog came to jump on her lap midway through our chat.
Even though I was slightly nervous at first, Kaila asked me how my day was and what was on my mind as soon as I booked the appointment. Before I knew it, the words were tumbling out about my life: the stress about money, Christmas travels, family, friends, Coronavirus. Everything that had been pent up inside came spilling out at once.
Kaila made me feel at ease as she actually listened to what I had to say, before telling me that it sounded like I had a lot on my plate (she was right). She helped me to prioritise what areas of stress I can actually change, gave me space talk about why I was finding things difficult, and offered a new perspective on my problems that I hadn’t heard before.
It was this new perspective that I found most useful.
A main source of stress for me was travelling over 400 miles to see my family for Christmas. I was scared about Covid-19, missing work, and potentially getting trapped away from home if travel restrictions changed.
Everyone I had spoken to about it had some kind of personal stake in the situation: my friends and family in my hometown wanted to see me and my partner was similarly worried about travel. Having someone totally impartial listen to how I was feeling and give me their honest opinion on the pros and cons was infinitely more valuable.
With Kaila’s help, I saw that the clear decision that would suit me the best was to stay put for Christmas. It took a frank and honest conversation with her to help me realise that I had been wanting to make this decision for a long time. Sometimes, you need to step out of a problem to see your way through it, and peer counselling was the perfect way for me to do just that.
A weight had been lifted from my chest; Kaila noted that sometimes one key issue can be causing your excess stress in other areas. She asked once again about the other problems I had raised at the beginning of our conversation, but suddenly they seemed to pale in comparison. She helped me to identify and solve the heart of my stress and everything else seemed so much more manageable.
Probably due to my absurdly fast speaking pace, we had covered a lot of what I wanted to talk about in just half an hour, when I was booked in for a full hour’s session. Kaila was flexible enough to say we could split the hour into two, and gave me another half hour session once I had discussed my travel plans with my family. Her genuine desire to help me through my problem was clear. She recounted her own fraught relationship with her parents in sympathy with me feeling nervous about not going home for Christmas.
Kaila treated me like a true peer and was receptive to how I was feeling. She took the lead at the beginning of the call when I was stuttering and nervous, but sat back calmly to listen when I finally started letting my problems loose. More than anything, it felt like chatting to a friend, but a friend who had no stake in the conversation other than helping me to solve my problem.
If you’re looking for a no-strings attached conversation with someone who is there purely to help you, then Peer Collective could be a great option. You can find counsellors according to precise specifications within minutes.
Choose between male, female, or non-binary, LGBTQIA or straight, young or older.
The thing I love most about this service is the fact you actually get to choose specifically who you talk to. And that can be really helpful when it comes to feeling comfortable with a counsellor.
*While Peer Collective are sponsoring The Breakdown, this is an honest review of their services. We will never promote something we do not believe to be beneficial to our readers.
