Why I’m over comparing myself to Instagram models

When we all started using Instagram, it was an exciting way to share every moment—the big and the small—with our families and our mates. It was a different way to connect, albeit through a heavily filtered, heavily edited lens.

Recently, there has been an increase in popularity of Insta models and influencers. According to a study by Hype Auditor in 2019, 32.8% of 18-24 year olds are more likely to engage with Instagram influencers.

The thing is, while I have nothing but respect for these creators—after all, they take time and effort to shoot all the content, what I do have a problem with is the way their content (their bodies) impacts my self-esteem and mental health. 

I’m not saying it’s their fault —it’s a manifestation of my own insecurities and my own anxieties when it comes to my body. But when the target audience for those Insta models are people with penises (usually)—whether to subscribe to their OnlyFans or find some sort of sexual gratification—an unrealistic body expectation is built up of that idealised version of what the female body should look like; big boobs, completely flat stomach, with a small waist and a big butt. 

Out of those four things, I only have the first—and it makes me severely self-conscious to the point where, at times, I don’t even want to look at myself in the mirror. I don’t want to see my own naked body. 

Photo by Maksim Goncharenok from Pexels

Hootsuite says 67% of 18-24-year-olds are likely to use Instagram multiple times a day. Seeing these types of bodies, ones accepted and romanticised by society, plants a seed of doubt.

Seeing this content, which was often reposted on Twitter, resulted in me feeling apprehensive when it came to eating, because I would be thinking about the calories and how much fat or sugar was in one thing. Coupled with my Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), it became a cycle of reading labels for the sugar and fat content, which I needed to do anyway for my health—but the way I was going about it, counting calories, limiting my food intake, was the complete opposite: it was unhealthy, bordering on the edge of a disorder. 

Photo by Oleg Magni from Pexels

An updated report from January 2021 breaks down the Instagram demographic by age and gender. The highest number of users are 18-24 year-olds and 25-34 year olds, the latter being more people with penises compared to people with vaginas. The worrying thing about this is often content is consumed through a vulnerable eye. Not only does it affect their body image and mental health, but if their significant other is lurking on those pages and following Insta models, it can create an even bigger element of low self-esteem and poor mental health, because depicted in these posts are images of gorgeous, glossy models that have the perfect figure, and the flawless skin. 

I know that everything I feel is a result of the way I see myself and, more than anything, I know that another person’s beauty does not take away my own. I know that. Yet on some other, deeper level, it is affecting me. 

Accounts on Instagram like Alex LightThe Birds Papaya, and Nelly London, are a warm welcome to the filtered Instagram content flooding our screens. They post about body expectations, reality vs Instagram, and pictures relating to the way bodies naturally look. Seeing their pages helped me to realise everything on Instagram is all angles, edits and filters – nobody puts their worst selves up on the Internet for the world to see. 

It’s imperative to realise that while gorgeous people do exist and while their content might affect our mental health and self-esteem, their primary aim is not that. They’re just out here making coins. I guess it would be nice if they addressed the issues that come with the pictures and videos promoting a body type that screams perfection. 

But the thing is, perfection doesn’t exist. 

To deal with the issues pertaining to seeing bodies that make you feel unsure about your worth and your beauty, try to take a step back and re-evaluate where this is coming from. Instagram, while fun to use and a way to reach out, isn’t really real. More often than not, they’re edited, filtered, posed. 

Maybe try a social media break and see if that changes anything – or set a daily limit if you absolutely need to use it. 

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